


Missing

by Kiniiru



Category: Kamisama Hajimemashita | Kamisama Kiss
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-11
Updated: 2015-03-11
Packaged: 2018-03-17 10:33:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3526016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiniiru/pseuds/Kiniiru
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What Tomoe actually feels for Nanami.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Missing

**Author's Note:**

> As always - if there are any huge mistakes, I apologize in advance.   
> I'd love to read some comments.   
> Hope you enjoy!

He loves her smile.   
It's not just a smile, it's so much more. How her soft, sweet lips start to twitch and her eyes show off that amused and happy look. How her face finally becomes bright and starts to shine due to the smile that floats through the room and touches his heart with smooth, gentle hands. He never felt something like it before, so he can't really explain it. But her sheer being seems to make him happy. It feels like his heart and body started blooming after a long, long time of being withered. He isn't really sure what he should do about it.   
Everytime she looks at him he feels warmth rushing through his body. Everytime she smiles he feels his heartbeat becoming faster and faster. Everytime she calls out his name, he feels so light as if he could fly. And he's happy just being by her side.   
On the other hand, he feels so scared that something could happen to her or that she could vanish. Every night he has to fear that she could go and never return to him. It's even harder than with Mikage. He's worrying because as a goddess, she's in great danger everyday. So many things could occur to her, she could die, be murdered, be hurt, anything. It's so hard for him to let her go, knowing that she could never come back to his side.   
He craves her being, he craves her heart. And he can't describe how he feels nevertheless, he doesn't even understand by himself. And he doesn't expect her to recognize, because he is well aware of the fact that he hides it a lot.   
To be honest, he can't even tell whether it's love or not. The feeling he has is just too overwhelming to be pure friendship, but what is love actually? He doesn't know and it confuses him everytime he thinks about it. 

Right now, he misses her. She's not here because she's gone to a friend's, and now he's all alone by himself in the shrine. It doesn't feel good, it doesn't feel right. It's like a stone on his chest and something tearing him apart from time to time so he shivers. He can't wait for her to return. He would love to be with her all the time, even though he knows it's nearly impossible. Although he acts like he hates it, hates her, he actually likes being around her a lot. And he knows that she does like him to be with her, as well, because she already confessed quite a while ago. He has to admit, he actually likes the thought of her being in love with him. It gives him that kind of sweet, happy feeling. When she actually told him about it, he was shocked. But now he likes it, and he would love her to say it again, to hear it again. And he is sure that he would answer in the same way so that they could be forever and she would never leave him.   
So he sits there and waits for her to return. In his mind, there are endless possibilities of how he could welcome her, greet her. But he knows he will just do it the way he does it everyday – not really friendly, more like he doesn't care or is bothered by her. Sighing, he grits his teeth and puts his head into his right hand. The left is holding the pipe whose smoke slowly ripples in the air. He can't think straight anymore. Frustrated, he burns a tiny fly who sits near his foot. What should he do? He bets she still is at her friend's, smiling and having fun, while the shrine is empty, cold and quiet. Like he was before, like he was when no god was here anymore protecting it. Procteting him. He shivers. The feeling gives him the chills. It's so well-known to him. He does care about it, a lot. Does care about her. His heart aches and he grumbles, angrily. „Why is this happening?“, he asks himself for the first time out loud. The words vanish in the air without being answered, and he knows he has to wait a long time before he gets the answer. Slowly, he puts down the pipe and falls backward until he lays on his back, looking up to the ceiling. He closes his eyes. Immediately, her face pops up, with that stupid, naive, beautiful smile.   
He jumps up and runs out of the room. „Oi!“, he shouts at the little shrine helpers who look at him with big eyes. „Where did she go?“, he asks, out of breath because he is so excited. He has to find her. Right now. Quietly, one of the ghosts points at the town with its finger. 

„Nanami. Nanami. Nanam...“ The fox stops. He hid is white tail and ears on his way down the stairs so that no one would recognize him. Now he stands in front of a house which looks exactly like Nanami's friend would live in it – peaceful and quiet. Not like a goddess at all.   
Slowly, he steps up to the door and rings the bell. He can hear loud and clear how fast footsteps rush down the stairs and then the door is opened. He looks down on a girl with blonde hair who stares back at him. „Hello.“, he says, not impressed at all. „I heard Nanami's here?“ The girl isn't able to answer, so just nods. In his head, he sighs. „I'm a friend of hers. I have to speak to her. Do you mind telling her that Tomoe is here?“, he continues. The girl's eyes widen for a second, then she nods. Running up the stairs, he hears her shout his mistress' name. Impatiently, he stands and waits. Suddenly, a girl rushes down the stairs. He smells her even before she arrives, like sweet, sweet flowers. Brown, warm eyes meet his, and she smiles. Happily. „Tomoeee~!“ She stops right in front of him. His lips twitch, trying to hide the smile that wants to come out as he sees here. What a kid. „Nanami.“, he answers. The girl is nearly jumping up and down in excitement. „Why are you here?“, she asks, looking up the stairs as two small faces appear, staring at them both in feverish interest. „I have to bring you back to the shrine.“, he answers, only waiting a second after she finished. His answer came too fast, he knows it. Nanami looks at him in a suprised way, then smiles and nods. „Un. Sure.“, she says. „Wait a second, I'll be there in a second.“ He nods, then turns away, listening at her talking to her friends and dressing up. As the door closes, he turns around again. Smiling, she stands behind him, looking into his face. „What have you been doing all this day?“, she asks as they start walking. He doesn't answer although he wants to. Not yet, not yet. The rest of their way, they walk beside each other silently.   
Reaching the shrine, he grabs her arm and pushes her into a room nearby. Surprised, she looks at him as he closes the door. „What is it?“, she asks, but before she can add anything else, she feels his arms around her body. Stunned, she stands there, waiting for words. Her eyes widen, as he answers, and her lips form a big, big smile that lets the room shine in thousand colours. He closes his eyes and enjoys her fragrance.   
„I missed you.“


End file.
